I remember ALL of the details like it was yesterday. February 16th, the release of Black Panther. I had tickets. I had the perfect outfit. An African print top, black pants with flat over-knee-boots. THOSE boots will turn out to be a bad decision. We’ll get to that part, in a bit.
My makeup was perfect with a red lip. My hair was, um, work appropriate. Transitioning from perm was a doozy. Another story, another day. The weather was great, I felt awesome and was ready for work. I tracked my train and headed out with a smile on my face. The snow had melted, I could almost skip down the walkway. And I almost did just that until BOOM … I slipped.
Yes, I slipped. THOSE flat over-knee-boots that I scored on black Friday were not the best decision. They were comfortable and cute but provided no match for the patch of ice I found at the end of the walkway. My right foot slipped and my first thought was, “Brandi, the drivers going by can see you. REMAIN VERTICAL!” As I tried balance in squat position, my right leg bent and down I went. I did not hear the break but I KNEW it was not good. I pulled my leg from under me and it didn’t look straight. Laying on the ground, no pain yet, I thought I could get up on my left leg and hop to the door of my apartment building. WRONG!
That level of pain that rippled through my body said, “YOU BETTER LAY HERE!” I listened.
I couldn’t move. The pain was UNBELIEVABLE! I was cold, wet and alone. A guy walked passed me but did not offer to help. I cried on the inside. Just as I called out to God, I saw a car reverse then a woman’s voice called out from street. “Are you okay?!” “NO, Ma’am, I am not! I believe I broke my leg.” She parked. Jumped out the car and ran to me. She helped keep me calm so I could call 9-1-1. Moments later, one of my neighbors came out. The woman who stopped left for work. I never got a chance to properly thank her. Thank YOU!
My neighbor could see my pain. Occasionally, I would yell out in agony. Then zone back out to focus off the pain. She started praying.
The fire department arrived, and assessed the situation. They began to whisper between questions. “How did this happen?!” .....“On a scale from 1 – 10, how much pain do you feel?!” ......“Ma’am, we need to remove your boot. Likely, cut them off. Are you okay with that?!” Thinking, I got these boots on black Friday at a really great price. Um, do I want them to cut them? NO! “Sir, please slide the boot off! I can take it, SLIDE IT OFF!” I zoned out. My neighbor prayed louder. They slid the boot off. I SCREAMED afterward, I was asked to wiggle my toes. The firemen sighed with relief. Back in a zone. More prayer.
As I entered the ambulance, I screamed into the voicemail of my manager to let him know I couldn’t make the client call. More prayer. The ride to the hospital was a long a painful one. The cast procedure felt worse than I imagine childbirth. I NEEDED surgery to repair 4 fractures. My leg was broken along with 3 fractures in my ankle. The next few months was very challenging. I was in pain. I was ANGRY. Not just with my situation but with God. How could he allow this to happen. Everyone kept saying, “He needed you to slow down to get your attention.” .... “WELL, SIR, YOU HAVE IT. WHAT DO YOU NEED FROM ME?!”
He never answered. My anxiety increase. I lashed out at everyone. I couldn’t walk. I couldn’t take care of myself. I was stuck. God wasn’t fixing it fast enough. Maybe my patience is what He needed. I’m not sure. Maybe He needed me to rely on Him. I’m not sure. Maybe He didn’t want anything and just allowed me to fall. Maybe? The whole time, I blamed God for punishing me. The bible doesn’t align with that thought. What had I done to be punished. Nothing. I was tired. I was frustrated. My anxiety was beyond control. Something had to change. Change would be with me. I began to seek peace.
I started talking to God again. Stopped avoiding church. Started to gain understanding. I began to gain strength. One month after ending, physical therapy, I ran a 5k on September 29, 2018. Let me say that again, I RAN MY FIRST 5k!!! That was a major accomplishment, because my doctors said it would take one year before I could. Six months post-op, and I was determined to experience with every ounce of joy in my body. I prayed to finish strong and I did, under 45 minutes. I mean it was 44:59 but hey I DID THAT! From that run, a NEW REVISED VERSION EMERGED.
To make change of my negative experience into a positive one, I created an apparel brand around my new motto: Broken Healed Stronger Better. This is the beginning of a larger initiative that I hope to launch in Spring/Summer of 2019. Stay Tuned!
Brandi Davis Graphic, Web + Apparel Designer http://idographicandweb.design
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